The strength to let go

 

He was a big guy with a tough outer appearance who obviously had a rough childhood.  His rugged looks had been the only thing that kept bad company away but on the inside he longed for someone to call his own.

But when he finally found someone who looked beyond his surface and deep into his heart, someone who would finally be his own, he didn’t know how to fully let himself trust her.  He couldn’t let her in.

It is true when they say that hurt people, hurt people because that’s exactly what he did. He threw daggers into her heart over and over and each time she would simply pull it out and smile through her tears and pain just to let him know that she wasn’t going to go anywhere.  Still, his childhood had him hardwired into believing that true love didn’t really exist and people would only stick with you until they found something new.

After years of being broken down and burned by this man she finally picked up the shattered pieces of her heart that lay in his wake and walked out the door and made a vow to never look back.

her strength was infused with anger and exhaustion, she could no longer take the uncertainty that came with trying to build a future with a man who seemingly did not want to.  She could no longer find it within herself to believe his words when he would tell her he loved her because his actions showed otherwise.

Through the years she’d lost herself trying to love a man who was incapable of loving and accepting love.  She took in her surroundings and swallowed against the bile that was building up within the pit of her stomach.  She was angry that her efforts were unappreciated, afraid that she was too damaged to love again.  Will she now be the one to hurt another?

This would be her first time facing the world alone and she didn’t think she could.  She wrestled with the option of turning back around and going back to something more familiar even if that meant she would have to endure more pain and heartache but the small resilient voice in the back of her mind persuaded her to put one foot before the other and keep going forward.

She didn’t know where she was going to go, didn’t know what she was going to do but she did know she deserved to be happy so she made happiness her destination.  She was determined to heal and when the time was right she would love again.

via Daily Prompt: Infuse

The stronger Sex?

All throughout history we’ve heard about how such great men have helped shape the world and everything we know.  We have heard about how men have fought in war and men were stronger by default simply because they are…men.

But if you really take a closer look you’d have to ask yourself, are men really the stronger sex?

Sure, physically, many men may be a wee bit stronger but what about every other aspect of life?

As of recently, men have been ticking me off, pissing me off, disappointing me and letting me down.  I have been really been walking around with hooked eyebrow.  What in the world is going on with our men?

In the celebrity world, we have T.I. stating marriage is a distraction and I’ve actually saw a man on my Facebook post the same exact thing stating, “I want a relationship but they are a distraction”

From what I heard Carmelo Anthony stated that LaLa has been married but he’s been single all along.

I can’t help but think, these men are bitches. Or maybe I should just say, these men are…men since calling someone a “bitch” implies they are weak and the word is also associated with women.

How could you go out and embarrass your wife like that? How could you publicly hurt her feelings? How could you ask a woman to marry you, have children with you (which puts our bodies through hell, by the way, with all of the changes and motions), support you and maybe even catch a case for you and you STILL have the nerve to hurt her? Men are supposed to protect their women, right? So what the hell is going on?

It’s taken me a while to finally put my thoughts into words because almost daily I’m baffled by the things men do.

The Facebook Killer. I mean what the hell?

Through the weeks I have probably thought of a 101 scenarios which can prove that women are more than likely the stronger gender  so forgive me if I forget some of my points but from the top of my head I’m going to list what I can. And yes, this list will be all over the map, because I’m upset and confused and desperately need to jot my thoughts down as they come.

So here it goes:

When a man cheats, he expects a woman to forgive him and take him back with no issue, but when a woman cheats, the man cannot do the same.  Why is that?

I am aware that there are men out there who are rape victims but they don’t come forward because they think it’s weak that a man should ever be raped by a woman because after all, men should want sex at all times and it’s unmanly to turn down sex with a woman, it’s “gay” if you will.  But I believe true strength comes from admitting you were violated and seeking justice.

Admitting there is a problem is a sign of strength, isn’t it?

All throughout history men have had to put women down just to prove they are stronger/ better.  Women had to fight for their rights and even when we were given equal rights, men felt so insulted and still cannot view women as equals.  Why is that? Are they afraid that a woman just might be able to do the same things they could only better?

It seems as if naturally women are more forgiving than men whereas men would rather just burn a bridge and never look back.  Isn’t forgiveness a sign of strength? Isn’t avoidance a sign of weakness?

A woman can work full-time, come home and cook and clean and make sure the children do their homework, are bathed and put to sleep, but it seems like most men are only wired to just work, eat and sleep, why is that? I need some answers.

A woman can be a stay-at-home-mom with four children under the age of five–which means she’s constantly moving around tending to each child, trying to establish a schedule, making meals, trips to the park, or other activities to keep the kids entertained–but the moment she asks her husband for a break so she can get me-time, most men would become overwhelmed at the mere thought of having to take care of four children at once. They may busy themselves with other things and the women possibly never gets that break, but when she snaps under pressure and stress, the man has the nerve to be confused as to why she did.

Are we not human? Are women robots or something?

Oh! And my favorite scenario! A man can lay up in bed with a woman, get her pregnant be aware of this pregnancy and still walk away from his responsibility claiming he didn’t want any kids in the first place or the kid isn’t his, or his day-to-day life doesn’t allow him to make room for a family.  Excuses, excuses, excuses.  So the responsibility of raising a child falls on the lap of the woman and often times when she has that responsibility she goes above and beyond to ensure that her children are well taken care of, yet she’s still considered weak because she may need government assistance to make up for the absentee father.

A man would belittle a woman based on her outer appearance then turn around and get upset when a woman decides she doesn’t want to be with a certain man.  It’s as if their ego can’t take rejection but they could dish it out with no problem.  I’m confused.

I was on Facebook the other day under a thread under an article posted in TheShadeRoom regarding the Carmelo Anthony and LaLa situation and a woman commented saying “My father told me don’t think a man can take what he dishes out because he can’t” and I was lost for words.  One, because a man knows this is true about men, and two, because a man knows this is true about men and most men aren’t doing anything about it.

Our generation of men are the most easily influenced group of men that I am aware of.  If a celebrity says they should call their wives and girlfriends, “Bitches” then our generation of men would do just that; if a celebrity states that a certain type of image accurately portrays beauty, then our generation of men would become bobble-heads and stop at nothing to destroy a woman’s self-confidence all because she doesn’t have a big butt, big boobs, long silky hair, light skin, “chinky” eyes and full lips. Then if a woman pays to get work done in order to fit the bill of men’s image of beauty, she becomes unworthy because none of her is “real”

Um, I think a lot of men have a lot of nerve.  They are never satisfied.  They complain if a woman is independent, they complain if she relies on government assistance; they complain if she works long hours, they complain if she doesn’t work at all; they complain if she works as a stripper to make ends meet, they complain if she would rather keep her clothes on and collect government checks to make ends meet.  All of this complaining and judging, ugh, aren’t those signs of weakness?

Correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t the saying go, “behind every good man is a strong woman”? or something to that effect? Which therefore means a man needs a woman and not the other way around?

Why are men so freakin’ selfish? Why do men expect women the stroke their egos day in and day out? Why are men so insulted by a woman’s strength to the point where he has to belittle her in order to feel good about himself?

I need some answers and I am open for a debate because I find none of this fair at all.  Women are supposed to take blow after blow and still be strong but if a man steps on glass he falls apart and it’s okay for him to.

I might add more to this should something else come to me.  But sound off, please, I am interested in hearing your opinions.